Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.
Ambrose Bierce
Patience. A minor form of despair disguised as a virtue.
Ambrose Bierce
Fidelity. A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
Ambrose Bierce
When you cannot get a compliment in any other way, pay yourself one.
Ambrose Bierce
Marriage. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, making in all, two.
Ambrose Bierce
Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
Ambrose Bierce
Friendship Quotes
Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
Ambrose Bierce
Pray. To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
Ambrose Bierce
Convent. A place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.
Ambrose Bierce
Funny Quotes
It is not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.