Quotemountain.com Famous Quotes It is not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.
-- Sir Edmund Hillary

Funny Quotes

Men are like steel; both are worthless when they loose their temper.

Attitude Quotes ,  Character Quotes ,  Funny Quotes ,  Miscellaneous Quotes

What if "the hokey pokey" is REALLY what it's all about?

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We are the people our parents warned us about.

Funny Quotes ,  Hot Quotes

Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well, I have others.

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The nice part of living in a small town is that when I don't know what I'm doing, someone else does.

Ego Quotes ,  Funny Quotes ,  Life Quotes

USA Today has come out with a new survey-apparently, three out of every four people make up 75 percent of the population.

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You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R's only one begins with an R.

Education Quotes ,  Funny Quotes ,  Knowledge Quotes

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

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Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?

Funny Quotes ,  Knowledge Quotes ,  Political Quotes

A good metaphor is something even the police should keep an eye on.

Funny Quotes ,  Great Quotes

I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.

Attitude Quotes ,  Faith Quotes ,  Funny Quotes ,  Religion Quotes

Although it is generally known, I think it's about time to announce that I was born at a very early age.

Age Quotes ,  Funny Quotes

I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind! The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building.

Funny Quotes

Convent. A place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.

Funny Quotes

I adore political parties. They are the only place left to us where people don't talk politics.

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Plagiarists at least have the quality of preservation.

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I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers.

Ethics Quotes ,  Funny Quotes

Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy -- the mother.

Children Quotes ,  Family Quotes ,  Funny Quotes ,  Parenting Quotes ,  Relationship Quotes

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

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I know all those people. I have friendly, social, and criminal relations with the whole lot of them.

Friendship Quotes ,  Funny Quotes

A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. What do you mean? responded her mother. Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came back with another.

Family Quotes ,  Funny Quotes ,  Love Quotes

If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.

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The trouble with the world is not that people know too little, but that they know so many things that ain't so.

Funny Quotes ,  Lies Quotes ,  Society Quotes

He has not a single redeeming defect.

Funny Quotes

When you get to my age life seems little more than one long march to and from the lavatory.

Age Quotes ,  Growth Quotes ,  Funny Quotes ,  Life Quotes

Last night the creative juices were flowing but today I am merely a vast wasteland of random thoughts.

Funny Quotes ,  Intelligence Quotes

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it.

Funny Quotes ,  Reading Quotes

In Mexico an air conditioner is called a politician because it makes a lot of noise but doesn't work very well.

Ethics Quotes ,  Funny Quotes ,  Leadership Quotes ,  Political Quotes

My sole inspiration is a telephone call from a director.

Funny Quotes

He believes that marriage and a career don't mix. So after the wedding he plans to quit his job.

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